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Anti-streamliningwear

02 Mar 2016

At the Center for Universial Research (CUR) there has been looming concern over the continuing streamlining of the human form over the last few millenia. Despite the occurrence of obesity in largely affluent areas of the world in recent times, "...streamlining of the human form continues unabashed..." claims visiting research assistant Dr Amanda Heinz while visiting the annual conference of SOTHF (Streamlining of the Human Form) at the South Dakota Sandunkin Human Research Laboratory.

Dr Zeus Brainchild, professor of Human Electroflex Magnetics, revealed the need to introduce a fashion design element to the catastrophic streamlining equation that confronts us all. "We have hired Diogo Sweatwrestler to design fashionable outfits at affordable prices that dissipate the current inevitability..." Dr Brainchild continued "...retail fashion design is an integral part of the human phenomena and should be utilised as such..."

Continuous research disseminating from CUR shows that although de-streamlining through the retail fashion paradigm might initially lead to some unintentional bumping and bouncing on major city pedestrian walkways, leading to set too's and fisty cuffs, eventually people will embrace the necessary actuality.

Mr. Sweatwrestler is known for his highly fashionable but unwearable outfits that have always included colourful and playful extrusions, "...bobbles, spikes and sunrays..." as reported in the retail fashion gazettes. Due to sciences failure to address this issue Mt Sweatwrestler was more than willing to respond to CUR's clarion call with what he said would be more "...bobbles, spikes and sunrays..." and the end of streamlining in the human form.

Additional reporting by Dr Peggy Bristles of the Bank of Notarf

Category: Spoof

Dr. Prof. Idolatry Sump

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